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| Still going strong, Jez Page, 2010 |
Jack: Well, we're here. We're sitting on the most perfect beach in the world, and all we can think about is-...I hate phones. I've long disliked taking phone calls, particularly from relatives in the US because of that slight audio delay stepping on everyone's cues. Around the turn of the millennium everyone in school started getting mobile phones. Call me a contrarian and, paradoxically, I'll agree. Amongst those age-groups and in that time, the phones were status symbols and displays of affluence. I've always eschewed those things - for example, I don't wear any type of jewellery. Just before I finished school I went out with friends for an entire day and didn't come home till 1am. My parents threatened to buy me a phone which I vehemently refused. There is nothing I find more annoying than having to drop what I'm doing to answer the home landline, except maybe people paying more attention to an incoming message on their phone than my half of the conversation. I like remaining un-contactable. Here comes the however. However, when I was down in London last year I was away from my desktop computer for four and a half days. I had to rely on that other thing I hate, television, to remain informed about events and it never asked 'Would you like to know more?'.
Angela: "Where I can hook up my modem?"
-The Net, 1995
Now that you're over the jump, here's the other however. However, there was still no way I was buying a mobile phone. I recalled in the mid-90s reading about LANs and WANs and the fascinating idea of a PAN - personal area network. I was looking for something that would fit in my pocket and be a reasonable stand-in for the desktop PC. I looked to Wikipedia to list the variety of computer dimensions. Desktops are already strictly microcomputers, so they aren't as many steps down to calculator and wristwatch as you'd think. Laptops, netbooks, and fondleslabs (ie, tablets) were all ruled out on size. That basically left the defunct 'palmtop' standard and PDAs. Yes, the personal digital assistant. I happen to use a very rugged Intermec CN3 at work - the so called 'postal digital assistant'. It's rugged alright. Mine fell out of my bag and landed on my foot one day and I kicked it across the landing. It survived without a scratch, although the software it runs is anything but robust. It locks up or freezes almost daily and for reasons unknown the device lock stops working occasional and the next time you pull it from your bag you find it's phoned the emergency services. Less extensively, five and a half years ago my dad dug out an old IBM-branded Palm III from his work. The irony is, in the year I was playing around with that ancient curiosity Hewlett Packard were working on the device I eventually bought - an HP iPAQ 214. 'Twas not cheap, though some unused Amazon gift vouchers chipped a bit off and paid for SD cards and a flip case.
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| "Hey Dolph, take a memo on your Newton" - The Simpsons |
My problem with much of mobile computing (tablets, smartphones, etc) is that, while they offer great convenience, it is convenience of consumption. Ordinarily the domination of one manufacturer over the market it is detrimental, yet the standardisation of the personal computer to IBM's specifications throughout the 80s led to great compatibility and a relatively open system. Apple's current crop of iPhones and iPads are all locked in. It's why Apple doesn't like people 'jailbreaking' their devices - because if you can run your own code on it you're not paying them for the privilege to do so. Same thing with Sony, which is why I dallied with buying a PSP several years ago as a mobile device until their campaign against homebrew software turned me away. They are the hardware equivalents of Microsoft's original intention for MSN to smother the internet - literally, the MicroSoft Network. Ideally I'd get a Raspberry Pi, but it's a bit too minimalistic for my utilitarian tastes - it doesn't come with a cover for starters.
So to my experiences of using the iPAQ for a few weeks. Firstly I don't have an issue with using a stylus. Frankly, touching the screen is an act of barbarism up there with eating dinner with your hands. The major pain in the arse has been Windows Mobile 6. In my haste to throw down a lot of money, I neglected to think through the consequences of that particular operating system. When I had issues trying to get it to sync with my desktop I looked up several troubleshooting guides on Microsoft's site. It felt like nine times out of ten I was instead redirected to a page promoting Windows Phone. A portion of what I paid went toward a Windows Mobile 6 licence, so I was getting pissed off. In the end Windows Device Centre didn't do what I wanted it to do, so it was a moot point. The major sticking point is that WM6 is an old operating system. There is nothing out there that supports it anymore. Firefox and Thunderbird only run on Android, and the mobile spin-off Fennec is a very buggy alpha release. I ditched that after only a few tries and repeated crashes. In the end I went with Opera Mobile 10 which was the only contender that was actually compatible, though a lot of mobile versions of sites don't like it. It's like the bad old days of writing one set of HTML for Internet Explorer and another for Netscape Navigator.
In the end I had to do a lot of digging on Google to find old versions of apps (I really hate that word. What was wrong with 'applet'?). YouTube wouldn't function - firstly because flash is too demanding on mobile processors and secondly because WM6 wouldn't play .3GP files. The YouTube app isn't perfect, but I can at least view videos with it. I also got an old copy of the Google Maps app as I was intending to go back down to London with my spiffy new pocket computer to take advantage of all those public wi-fi hotspots and hopefully not get lost. Windows Live was preloaded with the operating system, but as it is on the way out and it doesn't save conversation histories I went digging for an old version of Skype. I was extremely pleased to find it and get it working. Freewareppc.com was an initial godsend for finding programmes - now I can perfect my skills in chess or play Pokémon Red on the GNUboy emulator. Faced with all these frustrations I knew the iPAQ supported different operating systems, in particular that it supported some ports of Linux. I searched for and found a project to run Android on the iPAQ 200 series. It would be a hell of a lot easier to get stuff to run on it, although I'm not inclined to trust Google these days; what with trying to force me into using my real name on YouTube and probably eventually on here too, in which case I'll sooner hit the self-destruct button on this blog and re-establish it elsewhere (always backup, kids).
Anyway, my vision of mobile computing is still not reality. Lately I've been waking up and checking my e-mails with it - no, twitterandfacebook® did not replace that standard - and reading a few news articles. Whilst I might have been silent on this blog for the past month due to a bout of writer's block after the very productive last six months, I've scribbled little notes on the PDA to help me write some forthcoming essays. Thinking of a way to start a post is always the hardest part for me, so if I come up with something while lying in bed it's very handy to grab it and scribble down some words in the notepad. If anything it should cut down on paper use (where have you heard of that before?). My desk is usually strewn with envelopes on which I write all sorts, mostly because I consider it a terrible waste to throw them out with the credit card offers and the like they contained. This is really as much as I can ask of it besides being able to walk away from the desktop and still converse online... providing there's free wi-fi around. I can get a signal in my garden, so maybe I'll get reacquainted with deckchairs this summer without feeling cut off.
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